Looking good!

I don't know if anyone who reads this knows anything about fertility charting, but I just had to come on here and squeal and jump up and down. My chart is normally really jumpy with a lot of up and down temperatures during the second half of my cycle, but this time it's been steadily climbing for the past 7 days. If it stays up a few more days it will be considered triphasic, which in many cases indicates pregnancy!!! I am trying not to get to excited, but it looks so nice! I have never had such a pretty chart.

If you look at this link, you can see my chart. The top one is the current chart. The bottom one is last cycles chart. You'll see the difference between the two. Usually they look like the bottom one, so I am hoping this might be a really good sign. I'd appreciate any prayers you can say for me. After nearly 3 years, I would LOVE for this to be it. And I'd be due on my Mom's birthday. Not that she's my favorite person, but she would actually be excited about something I had done that way. lol Anyway.....here's the link to my chart.

Stephanie's Chart!

Trying the relaxed approach

So we've been trying this relaxed approach this cycle. I haven't been posting because short of giving you details about my sex lifeI didn't temp or use OPK's or anything. I decided a few days ago to go ahead and start temping again so that I knew for sure when I ovulated. I was annoyed that Clomid wasn't making me ovulate any earlier than I normally did (ok...it did, but only by 1 or 2 days, which didn't help matters) so I was going to call my RE at the end of this cycle and demand that he upped my dosage. Well, I started temping on CD 15 and it appears that I ovulated on CD 14. A textbook cycle. Thank you Clomid! I am beyond thrilled! Kind of. Because I ovulated early I am not really sure that we covered our bases this cycle. We did get to BD the day before and the day after, but I would have done more if I had realized.

Anyway...that should mean that my period will show up earlier than normal. Hopefully right around the 28 day mark. I'm still waiting until normal time (day 30-32) to expect it though. IF it doesn't show I'll test on day 37 (December 15th). Timing would be awesome. If I get a BFP, I'd call my RE and he'd want to do an ultrasound at 6 weeks and 8 weeks, so around the 22nd of December and again around January 5th. I "could" see the heartbeat on the first ultrasound, and we've decided that once we confirmed a heartbeat we would tell the family. Sounds like a Christmas dinner to remember! lol That would also make me being due on August 16th. My mom's birthday is the 15th. For once I could actually do something right in her eyes. I'm not getting my hopes up too high though, because like I said......timing of sex wasn't that great this time.

I'll keep you posted.

Not testing

I won't be testing. My period showed up. I'm on the fourth day of cycle #32. I am trying another cycle of 50 mg Clomid. I'm taking it cycle days 3-7, so bring on the side effects. If this cycle doesn't work I'll try one more and then I am asking for a change in dosage. You can only take this for 6 months and then you have to stop so I don't want to waste the entire 6 months doing 50 mg if it isn't helping. I'm a little concerned because I really think I should be ovulating earlier than I am.

This cycle I am trying a much more relaxed approach though. I am not going to be temping daily, and I am not going to be using OPK's. I will chart my cervical position and my cervical mucous so that I have some idea of when I ovulated, but I want a more relaxes approach. I desperately need a break, but I can't bring myself to stop trying, so this is probably as close to a break as I'll get till spring. IF I hit the three year mark (March) and still not pregnant then I might take a nice long break, but until then......I can't stop trying. Not even sure I will then.

Hopefully Clomid works this cycle and I don't have to worry about a break at all.

Am I or not?

I've decided that nature is cruel! I ovulated 7 days ago. I still have to wait at least 5 more days to find out if it worked and I'm pregnant or if once again we were unsuccessful and my period is going to show up. It's so aggravating! I mean....there should be some way to immediately know that we are pregnant. Like the minute you finish having sex a light on your forehead comes on or something.

I am just eager to see if my medicine worked! I had my progesterone levels checked today. I forgot to ask them when the results will be back so I'll call tomorrow and see if they have them, but I am not counting on it with election day and all. Probably Wednesday. It would be nice if I get it tomorrow though.

It would also be nice if it's a nice high number indicating a possible pregnancy. I'll be satisfied if it's just up around 15 or so where the RE would like to see it though. Oh this isn't fair.

I am having some symptoms that *might* look promising, but after two and a half years of this I have learned that most symtoms can be brought on by pregnancy or by pending menstrual flow (yet another one of natures unfair situations) so I am not too hopeful yet. My breasts feel heavy and have this strange burning, crampy sensation and have for several days now. I've had a kind of full feeling and a dull ache in my lower abdomen. And I have been so moody. I mean, I have cried over freaking EVERYTHING lately. I've always been an emotional person, but this is crazy! And I am tired. So flipping tired. It's only 7:30 and I can barely hold my eyes open.

If I go to bed now will someone please come wake me up on the 15th when I plan on testing? lol

I guess I did

So I did ovulate. It's not a question anymore. It just wasn't as early as I thought it was. It looks like our timing was good this cycle, so if the Clomid has done it's job, then hopefully by the 15th we will have a positive pregnancy test! I go for my progesterone test on Monday, Nov.3. I'll get the answers back on the 5th. Should be a 24 hour turn around but with election day it will take an extra 24 hours (unless I can get it done at the hospital...I'm checking into that....then maybe same day results). I'm trying not to get too excited but I am hopeful.

We decided to pick two names for each sex so that we are prepared just in case. We've already settled on our two names for boys and our possible girl names is down to a short list now. It's a bit harder to pick a girl name. There are so many that I like!

I've nearly finished crocheting one blanket, and I plan on making at least 2 more, 1 for a girl and one neutral. I'm also making little hats for boys, girls and neutral. I really think that all this TTC has finally started to eat away at my sanity. I caught myself rubbing my belly and talking to it earlier today. LOL If this is our cycle the baby hasn't even implanted and I am already talking to him/her. Yep....I'm starting to lose it!

Maybe not

I guess I didn't O yet afterall. But I think I am getting ready to. Now I have to call the RE's office on Monday to find out do they want my bloodwork done on CD 21 or 7 dpo. In a textbook cycle, that is the same day. It won't be this cycle for me. My OPK today was so close to + that it isn't even funny. I'm expecting it to be + when I test again later today. I should ovulate in the next 24 hours or so. Guess what I'll be doing this weekend? lol I'm having cramps on my left side too, so that must be were I am ovulating from. Hopefully it's two eggs! I want twins!

I'm still hopeful about this cycle. It's early enough that I could have a normal luteal phase easily. I just really want to be pregnant so bad that it hurts! I'm running out of steam, and if I have to quit TTC......it will be so heartbreaking. I really think that part of me will die if I am never pregnant again. Maybe that sounds stupid, but I just want this so desperately. I've never wanted anything this much before!

I did. I think. Did I?

I think I ovulated. Which sucks. It sucks because Matt had been sick for a few days. There hadn't been any "deposits" lately. It's not completely impossible, but after 31 cycles, I'm realistic, and my chances this cycle aren't. It also sucks because I never got a positive OPK even though I was using a good brand and testing twice a day. For some reason my body just isn't working with them anymore. So frustrating!

My temperature was up today, which indicates that I probably did ovulate. Especially since I was cold and expecting it to be down. I couldn't believe that it was up nearly a whole degree. (4 tenths of a degree indicates ovulation) I did temp late this morning but if anything that should have made it lower instead of higher. I'll have to see what happens in the morning and the next day to know for sure, but I'm fairly certain.

There is a good side to this. I'm on cycle day 14. I don't think I have ever ovulated on day 14. It means that Clomid is doing it's job! I should have a nice long LP and if there are any swimmers in there that make it to the egg they should have time to fertilize and then the egg could implant before I start my period (which has been part of the problem in the past.....just ovulating too late and not having time for this to happen).

I want this to be the cycle that I finally get pregnant with a healthy pregnancy. It would be so perfect. We could have an ultrasound at the RE's office early on (around 8 weeks) and see the heartbeat. We've agreed to tell the family once we see the heartbeat (which can be seen as early as 6 weeks, but waiting until 8 weeks ensures that we should see it and will eliminate the chance of unneeded stress.) With the timing.....if we got it this cycle we could tell everyone at Christmas. That would be so fun! I'm hopeful, however after 31 cycles, I'm also realistic, and I'm not getting my hopes up too high. I guess we'll know in a few weeks.

I'm still not testing early though. It causes too much heartache!