I am in the 2WW again. Actually about a week into it. This is the last Hurrah for a while. We've decided we are going to put TTC on hold. Another sibling, another BFP. It's all we can take. Matt's brother and his wife chose Christmas day to announce that she is expecting again. The still live with his parents (and have since they got married) they don't help out much with the housework or the bills, their baby is only 8 months old, they expect everyone around them to help take care of him Just hours after announcing they were pregnant again she told him "you have to take him I've had him since we got here!" Like an hour and a half, and he spent most of that being passed around the house. He of course replied with "Give him to Dad or to Stephanie or someone. You know I can't ever get him to go to sleep." Yes, I am bitter. Yes, I am probably acting childish (I certainly did that day). Yes, I am still going to put TTC on hold. We aren't going to be preventing. I don't believe in hormonal birth controls and Matt has a latex allergy anyway so our options would be limited. I won't be trying though. No pills, no herbs, no supplements, no waking up early to temp, no over-examining every freaking change in my body.
It's a relief actually. We decided this on Christmas Day, but I waited until I was sure before writing about it here. We are working on weight-loss now. Fact is.....I'm fat. I got that way by eating whatever I wanted and not exercising much because "it might delay ovulation" or "it might keep me from implanting". I was overweight before I moved out here, but in three years I've gained forty pounds or so. Now I am just fat. For a little while longer.
The day after Christmas I started eating healthier and smaller portions. I also bought two DVD's and plan to get more over the next several weeks. Before we start TTC again Matt and I both want to lose 65 pounds each. You can view my new weight-loss journal HERE
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About Me
- Stephanie ~*~ThePastorsWife~*~
- I am 28 years old, the wife of a wonderful man who I met online, and the mother to two beautiful children. I have a 10 year old daughter, Sierra, and a 7 year old son, Will. We are currently working on weight-loss and waiting to try to conceive our first child together!
A bit of history
Matt and I started trying to conceive our first together in March of 2006. We didn't tell anyone though because we had just moved in together, and we knew that people would think we were rushing. We got our first positive pregnancy test in October 2006 (1 year after we started dating) sadly it ended as quickly as it began. This was the first of five miscarriages. We had another in May 2007 (on my birthday) on in August 2007, a fourth in June 2008 and the most recent in August of 2008. We saw a specialist for the first time in September, and immediately he decided I needed diagnostic surgery. I didn't have the issue he thought I had, but he did find and correct another issue. Testing revealed that Matt was perfectly healthy (reproductively) even though we suspected that the problem was with him. Further testing showed that I had low progesterone levels after ovulation and wasn't capable of supporting a pregnancy. This was brought on by an estrogen imbalance prior to ovulation. I was ovulating very late in my cycle and it was a weak ovulation (meaning my eggs weren't maturing completely before ovulation). I am currently on medication that blocks my body from recognizing estrogen, which causes me to make LOTS of it, so I have very mature eggs, and most often, multiple eggs. I also ovulate much earlier, and this has fixed my progesterone issues after ovulation. I can only take this medicine for 6 months, so March of 2009 will be my last round. Hoping for a pregnancy before that point. If not, we will discuss moving forward to IUI or IVF.
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